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04/06/1993 |
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I don't want to be hostile
I don't want to be dismal
And I don't want to rot in
An apathetic existence
See, I want to believe you
And I wanted to trust you
And I want to have faith to
Put away the dagger
But you lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
And I tolerate you
You lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
How can I tolerate?
Veil of virtue hung to hide your method
While I smile and laugh and dance
And sing your praise and glory
Shroud of virtue hung to mask your stigma
As I smile and laugh and dance
And sing your glory while you
Lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
How can I tolerate you?
You lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
How can I tolerate?
Our guilt, our blame
I've been far too sympathetic
Our blood, our fault
I've been far too sympathetic
I am not innocent
I am not innocent
You are not innocent
No one is innocent
You lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
(x3)
You lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
You lie, cheat and steal
How can I tolerate?
I will not tolerate you
I will go down beside you
I must go down beside you
No one is innocent
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It took so long to remember just what happened.
I was so young and vestal then,
you know it hurt me,
but I'm breathing so I guess I'm still alive
even if signs seem to tell me otherwise.
I've got my hands bound,
and my head down, and my eyes closed,
my throats wide open.
I do unto others what has been done to me
Do unto others what has been done to you
I'm treading water,
I need to sleep a while.
My lamb and martyr,
you look so precious.
Wont you, won't you come a bit closer,
close enough so I can smell you.
I need you to feel this,
I can't stand to burn too long.
Released in this sodomy.
For one sweet moment I am whole.
Do unto you now what has been done to me.
Do unto you now what has been done...
You're breathing so I guess you're still alive
even if signs seem to tell me otherwise.
Won't you, wont you come just a bit closer,
close enough so I can smell you.
I need you to feel this.
I need this to make me whole.
There's release in this sodomy.
For I am your witness that
blood and flesh can be trusted.
I am your witness that
blood and flesh can be trusted
And only this one holy medium brings me piece of mind.
Got your hands bound, your head down,
and your eyes closed.
You look so precious now.
I have found some kind of temporary sanity in this
shit blood and cum on my hands.
I've come round full circle.
My lamb and martyr, this will be over soon.
You look so precious...
You look so precious...
You look so precious...
You look so precious, now...
You look so precious...
. . .
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There's a shadow just behind me
Shrouding every step I take
Making every promise empty
Pointing every finger at me
Waiting like a stalking butler
Who upon the finger rests
Murder now, the path that must be
Just because the son has come
Jesus, won't you blow youre fucking whistle
something but the past and done?
Jesus, won't you blow youre fucking whistle
something but the past and done?
Why can't we not be sober?
I just want to start this over
And why can't we drink forever?
I just want to start this over
I am just a worthless liar
I am just an imbecile
I will only complicate you
Trust in me and fall as well
I will find a center in you
I will chew it up and leave
I will work to elevate you
Just enough to bring you down
Mother Mary, won't you whisper?
Something bout what's past and done
Mother Mary, won't you whisper?
Something bout what's past and done
Why can't we not be sober?
I just want to start this over
And why can't we sleep forever?
I just want to start this over
why?
I am just a worthless liar
I am just an imbecile
I will only complicate you
Trust in me and fall as well
I will find a center in you
I will chew it up and leave
Trust me
Trust me
Trust me
Trust me
Trust me
Why can't we not be sober?
I just want to start things over
And why can't we sleep forever?
I just want to start this over
why?
I want it, what I want it
I want it, what I want it
I want it, what I want it
I want it, what I want it
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my compassion is broken now
my will is eroded now
my desire is broken now
it makes me feel ugly
i'm on my knees and burning
my piss and moans are the fuel
that set my head on fire
so smell my soul that's burning
i'm broken
looking up to see the enemy
i have swallowed the poison you feed me
but i survive on it
and it leaves me
guilt fed
hatred fed
weakness fed
and it makes me feel ugly
i'm on my knees and burning
my piss and moans are the fuel
that set my head on fire
i'm dead inside
shit adds up [repeat 4x]
at the bottom
if i let you, you would make me destroy myself
in order to survive you
i must first survive myself
and i can sink no further
and i cannot forgive you
i have no choice but to confront you
to engage you
to erase you
i've gone to great lengths to expand my threshold of pain
i will use my mistakes against you
there's no other choice
shameless now
nameless now
nothing now
no one now
but my soul must be iron
cuz my fear is naked
i'm naked and fearless
and my fear is naked
dead inside [repeat 4x]
nameless now
shameless now
nothing now
no one now
shit adds up [repeat 4x]
you see my naked now
fearless now
naked now
fearless now
shit adds up [repeat 3x]
it leaves me
dead inside [repeat 4x]
hatred keeps me alive
loneliness keeps me alive
weakness keeps me alive
guilt keeps me alive
at the bottom
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Crawled away from me.
Slipped away from me.
I tried to keep ahold,
but there was nothing I could say.
Slid away from me
Crept away from me
Tried to keep you down
But there was nothing I could say.
What you try to say
is you don't wanna play.
What you want and what you need
don't mean that much to me.
I can see your back is turning.
If I could I'd stick the knife in.
You crawled away from me.
Slipped away from me.
I tried to keep ahold,
but there was nothing I could say.
Slid away from me
Crept away from me
I tried to keep you down
But there was nothing I could say.
What you tried to say
is you don't wanna play.
But what you want and what you need
don't mean that much to me.
I can see your back is turning.
If I could I'd stick the knife in.
This is love.
This is love,
This is my love for you,(x5)
This is my love.
Say you won't go.
Say,
Get up.
Get up.
Say.
Get up,
Get up,
Get up,
Now!
What you try to say
is you don't wanna play.
But what you want and what you need
don't mean a fuck to me.
I can see your back is turning.
If I could I'd stick the knife in.
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My warning meant nothing
You're dancing in quicksand
Why don't you watch where you're wandering?
Why don't you watch where you're stumbling
You're wading knee deep and going in
You're wading knee deep and going in
This bog is thick and
Easy to get lost in
'Cause you're a stupid
Belligerent fucker
This bog is thick and
Easy to get lost in
'Cause you're a dumb-ass
Belligerent fucker
I hope it sucks you down
Down
Down
Down
My warning meant nothing
You're dancing in quicksand
Why don't you watch where you're wandering?
Why don't you watch where you're stumbling?
You're wading knee deep and going in
And you may never come back again
This bog is thick and
Easy to get lost in
'Cause you're a stupid
Belligerent fucker
This bog is thick and
Easy to get lost in
'Cause you're a dumb-ass
Belligerent fucker
I hope it sucks you down
My warning meant nothing
You're dancing in quicksand
Why don't you watch where you're wandering?
Why don't you watch where you're stumbling
You're wading knee deep and going in
And you may never come back again
This bog is thick and
Easy to get lost in
'Cause you're a stupid
Belligerent fucker
This bog is thick and
Easy to get lost in
'Cause you're a dumb-ass
Belligerent fucker
I hope it sucks
I hope it sucks
I hope it sucks you, fucker
I hope it sucks
I hope it sucks
I hope it sucks you down
Wandering, wandering
No one even invited you in
Still stumbling
Suffocate, suffocate
Why don't you get away?
Wandering around and wandering
No one even invited you in
You're still stumbling
Suffocate, suffocate
Why don't you get out while you can?
No one told you to come
My warning meant nothing
You're dancing in quicksand
Why don't you watch where you're wandering?
Why don't you watch where you're stumbling?
You're wading knee deep and going in
And you may never come back again
This bog is thick and
Easy to get lost in
'Cause you're a stupid
Belligerent fucker
This bog is thick and
Easy to get lost in
'Cause you're a dumb-ass
Belligerent fucker
I hope it sucks
I hope it sucks
I hope it sucks you, fucker
I hope it sucks
I hope it sucks
I hope it sucks you
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Two times now (times now)
I've been struck down by a voice that
Speaks from deep beneath the endless water
It's twice as clear as Heaven
Twice as loud as reason
Deep and rich like silt on a riverbed
And just as never-ending
The current's mouth below me
Opens up around me
Suggests and beckons all while swallowing
Surrounds and drowns and sweeps me away
But I'm so comfortable
Too comfortable
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up
You're saturating me
How could I let this bring me back to my knees?
Third time now (time now)
I've been baptized by a voice that
Screams from deep beneath the cold and black water
It's half as high as Heaven
Half as clear as reason
Clear and black like silt on a riverbed
Just as never-ending
The current's mouth below me
Opens up around me
Suggests and beckons all while swallowing
Surrounds and drowns and wipes me away
But I'm so comfortable
Too comfortable
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up
You're saturating me
How could I let this happen?
Why don't you kill me?
I am weak and numb and insignificant
How could I let this bring me back to my knees?
Euphoria
Euphoria
Euphoria
Euphoria
I'm back down
In the undertow
I'm helpless and awake
I'm in the undertow
Awake down beneath the undertow
There doesn't seem to be a way out of the undertow
Euphoria
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Get up
Get up now
Get up
Get up now
Get up
Get up now
Get up
Get up now
Free yourself
From yourself
Free yourself
From yourself
Locked up inside you
Like the calm beneath castles
A cavern of treasures
No one has been to
Let's go digging
Let's go digging
Bring it out and
Take it back in
You won't do what you'd like to do
Lay back and let me show you another way
I'll kill what you want me to
Take what's left and eat it
Take all or nothing
Life's just too short to push it away
Take it all
Take it all in
All the way in
All the way in
Let it go in
Let it go in
You won't feel what you'd like to feel
Lay back and let me show you another way
I'll kill what you want me to
Take what's left and eat it
Take all or nothing
Life's just too short to
Knock me down
I'll just come back running
Knock you down
It won't be long now
All the way in
All the way in
All the way in
All the way in
Way in
I'll kill what you want me to
Take what's left and eat it
I'll take all or nothing
Life's just too short to push it away
Take it all
Take it all higher
Four degrees now
Four degrees warmer
Give in now
Give in now
Let me in
You'll like this
This brings us higher
You'll like this
It brings us closer than
Dying and
Cancer and
Crying
Let's take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
Take it
I'll kill what you want me to
Take what's left and eat it
Take all or nothing
Life's just too short to lose it
Just like that
Just like that
Just like...
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Here comes the water.
All I knew,
All I believed,
Crumbling images,
No longer comfort me.
I scramble to reach higher ground,
order and sanity,
something to comfort me.
Take what is mine,
hold what is mine,
suffocate what is mine,
bury what's mine.
Soon the water will come
and claim what is mine.
I must leave it behind,
and climb to a new place now.
This ground is not the rock I thought it to be.
Thought I was high,
Thought I was free.
Thought I was there
divine destiny.
I was wrong.
This changes everything.
Running away,
Running away,
I'm running away,
Running away,
I'm running away,
Running away,
I'm running away,
Running away.
I take what is mine,
hold what is mine,
suffocate what is mine,
bury what's mine.
Soon the water will come
and claim what is mine.
I must leave it behind,
and climb to a new place.
Water's rising up on me.
The water is rising up on me.
Thought the sun would come deliver me,
but the truth has come to punish me instead.
Grounds break down right under me.
Cleanse and purge me
in the water.
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And the angel of the Lord came unto me,
snatching me up from my
place of slumber,
and took me on high,
and higher still until we
moved in the spaces betwixt the air itself.
and he bore me unto a
vast farmland of our own midwest,
and as we descended cries of
impending doom rose from the soil.
one thousand, nay, a million
voices full of fear.
and terror possessed me then.
and I begged,
"Angel of the Lord, what are these tortured screams?"
And the angel said unto me,
"These are the cries of the carrots,
the cries of the carrots.
You see, reverend Maynard, tomorrow is harvest day
and to them it is the holocaust."
And I sprang from my slumber drenched in sweat
like the tears of one millions terrified brothers
and roared,
"Hear me now,
I have seen the light,
they have a consciousness,
they have a life,
they have a soul.
damn you!
let the rabbits wear glasses,
save our brothers...can I get an amen?
can I get a hallelujah? thank you, Jesus.
life feeds on life feeds on life feeds on life feeds on...
this is necessary
it was daylight when you woke up in your ditch.
you looked up at your sky.
that made blue be your color.
you had your knife with you there too.
when you stood up there was goo all over your clothes.
your hands were sticky.
you wiped them on your grass,
so now your color was green.
oh Lord, why did everything always have
to keep changing like this?
you were already getting nervous again.
your head hurt and it rang when you stood up.
your head was almost empty.
it always hurt you when you woke up like this.
you crawled up out of your ditch unto your gravel road
and you began to walk
and waited for the rest of your mind to come back to you.
you could see the car parked far down the road
and you walked toward it.
if God is our father, you though,
then Satan must be our cousin.
why didn't anyone else understand these important things?
when you got to your car,
you tried all the doors,
but they were locked.
it was a red car and it was new.
there was an expensive leather camera case lying on the seat.
out across your field
you could see two tiny people walking by your woods.
you began to walk towards them.
now red was your color and of course,
those little people out there were yours too
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