Taintstick Album

Welcome, welcome to the show
and listen as we tell you all you need to know
about chicks, and fighting and moto
but mostly, check out my balls
BALLS
my big fat hairless balls
BALLS
your mouth, your mouth couldnt fit it all
ALL
A tiger, a tiger goes roar
ROAR
So if your hot and your cookies shaved, Taintstick is fucking you all

I got something i wanna say to you
theres nothing that we cant fucking do
we're bigger than all thats been alive
Fuck the dinosaurs, all they did was die
no one can beat us
We got the penis
We made boats and bikes and razor blades
Boob jobs and cars and microwaves

Six pounds, six pounds of sound
Lets go a couple of rounds
we're know for our ground and pound
Taintstick, six pounds of sound

if you think that this is all we've got
Bullshit we've barely reached the top
Theres nowhere for us to go but down
Im the king so where the fucks my crown
I am the future
robots and computer, that fight.
For their freedom together we can beat them
With

One-More thing for us to do
two-for the balls that slap on you
three-cause it comes right after two
four-its the right amount of boms
five-most lines til shit goes down
six-nights in korea town
Pounds-the scales into the ground

SIX POUNDS OF SOUND

Hey dude, your cool, i really think you are
do you feel like, grabbing a quick bite and roller blading in the park?
let me tell you a little bit about myself
I aint faking, i love clay aiken and teddy bears
and what paris wears as well

I like parties and bear and i think that i'd like you
to get started, right here
lets get some apple juice

hey man here's a flower, we could sniff for hours and hours
or instead, ill give you head
if my mom catches us we'll both be dead
tell me more of the things that you like best
like fallout boy, AFI and ryan seacrest

do you like parties and bear, and what ill do to you
if we get started, right here
lets get some apple juice
my penis, your rear, ill wipe off all the poo
did you test, come out clear? Cool
lets get some apple juice

im the man with the plan lets get started
hit the track wanna watch me flip
getting beav like my boy Carey hart did
g-give it a kick and ride my motodick

Motodick
bitches wanna ride it
motodick
it aint hard to find
motodick
none of you can fight it
motodick
up between your thights

Getting paid getting laid for my knack knacks
hanging out with the Reed on the scene
hit the club check that thcick she got back back
shes a four stroke you know what i mean

Motodick
bitches wanna ride it
motodick
it aint hard to find
motodick
none of you can fight it
motodick
up between your thights

drinking booze free tattoos and a neck brace
Kat von D is a dude not a chick
All you ladies just wait for my next race
g-give it a kick and ride my motodick

motodick
bitches wanna ride it
motodick
it aint hard to find
motodick
none of you can fight it
motodick right between your eyes

Motodick
Kawasaki mother fuckers

Sometimes when its late at night
And theres no pot, no pot in my pipe
And im feeling, feeling a little down
Cause i dont know noone out here in korea town
Thats when I think of you and all of the majestical fingers
Its time baby

Handjob, I just want a hand job
that is, that is all that i want
dont talk, i just want a hand job
your job is to give me a hand job

Staring, staring at your face
as your fingers go to that special place
work it up and down and around and round
back in all the glory of my six pounds

Just give me lube
dont even want to see your boobs
i get free shoes
yea

NO
I dont wanna kiss you
NO
I aint gonna gist you
NO
just give me a tissue

Macacases, gorillas and chimpanzees
Trying to bring the world down to its knees
They've been planning their attack for centuries
but they better watch their backs, cause they wont get me
Now listen to me good all you fucking baboons
i am the Truth and im the Prophet of Doom
Im gonna reach into your women and pull out their wombs
The end is on its way and i'm coming for you

Watchout!

look at em run, look at em hide, look at em fall
They are the Monkeys of war
nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, nowhere at all
They are the monkeys of war
We will decide who lives and who dies and who hears the call
They are the monkeys of war
Look at em run, look at em hide look at em fall
they are the monkeys of war

monkeys to the left and right of me
Dragging all the children up into the trees
Ill be bringing down the pain on the whole species
They are not the only one that can throw feces
Now hear me all you apes Im the fucking best
Im gonna save the human race and erase the rest
By the time that I am finished there be no one left
Im gonna carve my moms name into your moms check

Come on

Sooner or later there comes a time
When every man must put his life on the line
If he wants to survive
Against the Monkeys of war

so you can wake up now or keep on thinking im insane
but you want be saying that when a monkey eats your brain
When he eats your brains!

The world is dying, there's no air left to breath
And all we care about is stupid celebrites
And all the talk of war and election years
We never listen to the kids and the things they fear

These are things that I dont care about
Theres just one thing that makes me wanna shout

Why cant i shoot a load on your face?
Forget the world its a a messed up place
Theres no tomorrow , theres no times to waste
Just let me shoot a load on your face

A girl si born with far too many legs
iraqi people are forces to steal and beg
Katrina came and left so many dead
The children pray, they pray for their daily bread

Theres nothing I wouldnt do, to get it all over you
i love you baby and thats the truth, and if you loved me you want me to

These are things that i dont care about
That make you cry, that make you want to shout
but all im asking, is "When can i pull it out?"

Why cant i shoot a load on your face?
Forget the world its a messed up place
Theres no tomorrow theres no time to waste
Just let me put a load on your face
Why cant i put a load on your face?
Heard what you said about hating the taste
What better way to finish the day
Just let me put a load on your face

The earth is dying but I don't give a shit
I've got a load
So who feels like catching it?

All you mother fuckers in the fucking place its time to fuck you fuckers up
you think tough, you think your so fucking cool
i fucked your mom cause she's a fucking tool

Ill fuck your face, im fucking your face
ill fuck your face, im fucking your face
ill fuck your face, im fucking your face
ill fuck your face, im fucking your face

you want a war, ill got a fucking war
im the fucking future, fuck your fucking past
and in time im gonna fuck your mind
with a fucking snake shoved up my fucking ass

you fucking bitches think your so fucking hot
you fucking bitches think we're gonna fuck
i wouldnt let you bitches touch my cock
you think we're fucking, well you're shit out of luck

I dont want the cookie, dont want your ass or your tits too
all i want is your face babe
fuck that shit til its turns blue
some people think its wrong, some chicks get turned on
would it help if i said please baby get down on your knees

all you bands with all your bitch ass fans
go fuck yourselfs you bunch of fucking tools
fuck this, fuck that, fuck it all, fuck me, fuck them, fuck you!

The trims carbon fiber, i got screens in the visors
you'll be dead on arrival, when you see my machine
DeModas are blacked out, makes big foot look cracked out
you know you'll get smacked down
the shit is obscene

ride all day in my a6k
all you pt cruisers, get out of my way
put in the tinkerbell dvd and just press play
cause im rollin hard in my a6k

Check out the twin pipes, they stick out the right side
bitches wonder who's inside, well too bad its me
watch out for the kid seat, the toys under your feat
and snookie tells fifty
"Keep your fur off the seats"

If you need some proof, my names in the roof
...give me shoes, free shoes, fuck you
VMOD's in the dash, motosaki in back
on my way to the track, to laps and kick ass
you want it, i got it, steve built it, he fucking killed it
He made it faster, made it lighter
im the future, the green knight rider YEAH!

I tell time by my nixon, get checked out by the chicks
and you should all quit your bitchin, A6k's all i need
Well that and my dagger, my wife's stoked that i tg her
cause me and this truck are baby making machines

Ride all day in my a6k
all you pussies on scooters get out of my way
put in the ariel dvd and just press play
cause im rollin hard in my a6k

Join me now as you a tale, the greatest you've ever heard
of the bravest of men, the slayer of gunts
Sir eagle cock the third

He comes from a place its a magical world
When things are just not quite real
where a man with no legs runs a charity race
and could still finger jessica biel

A man with no penis who comes to redeem us
and save us from all we fear
The sea turtles of doom, the vagina ungroomed
and the gerbils of Richard Gere

he's a man you can count on, he'll climb any mountain
and always he's up for fun
if your chick has a friend
he will always pretend that the bitch isnt ugly or dumb

There once was a time without reason or rhyme
when the one legged sea gunt awoke
it was death or romance and so off came his pants
and he gave her a chairty poke

So gather round children, be silent and listen
to stories you've never heard
of neckless raccoons and bush pigs of dick boom
A hero who half man, half bird

If you think that you've seen it, you'll only have dreamed it
cause eagles have no dick or balls
a cock in name only
he has no baloney
our hero has no cock at all

[No lyrics]

I love Tiger, I love Fifty
I love Tiger, I love Fifty
I love Tiger, I love Fifty
I love Tiger, I love Fifty
I love Tiger, I love Fifty
I love Tiger, I love Fifty
I love Tiger, I love Fifty
I love Tiger, I love Fifty

All you mother fuckers in the fucking place its time to fuck you fuckers up
you think tough, you think your so fucking cool
i fucked your mom cause she's a fucking tool

Ill fuck your face, im fucking your face
ill fuck your face, im fucking your face
ill fuck your face, im fucking your face
ill fuck your face, im fucking your face

you want a war, ill got a fucking war
im the fucking future, fuck your fucking past
and in time im gonna fuck your mind
with a fucking snake shoved up my fucking ass

you fucking bitches think your so fucking hot
you fucking bitches think we're gonna fuck
i wouldnt let you bitches touch my cock
you think we're fucking, well you're shit out of luck

I dont want the cookie, dont want your ass or your tits too
all i want is your face babe
fuck that shit til its turns blue
some people think its wrong, some chicks get turned on
would it help if i said please baby get down on your knees

all you bands with all your bitch ass fans
go fuck yourselfs you bunch of fucking tools
fuck this, fuck that, fuck it all, fuck me, fuck them, fuck you!