Speech Debelle Album

2 am in my hostel bed, my eyes them red, my belly aint fed,
I got butter but I aint got bread and I'm smoking on my last cigarette.
I aint got creds I can't make calls, got no papers I got no jewels.
Got debts up to my eyeballs who made these rules, it's a catch 22.
Christmas soon come and I got no funds but what's Christmas if you aint at mums.
What I'm spose to do sit here and wait for this little JSA. No blasted way,
I'm a call G and get a food on conceit or use my giro and by a 16th,
now that's small time but I got to make p's, I'm so hungry man I just gotta eat and 2 a certain degree,
I'm intrigued by these streets, they say misery loves company and I'm so comfy I could fall asleep but I can't do that.
I'm surrounded by cats, filthy cats sitting in steps with cat size rats.
Yep it's a fact I'm truly lost now, will I end up where I can't be found.

When life hits you with issues, Makes you wanna cry and wet tissues,
Wondering who's really with you, what you gonna do,
When it gets a dramatic, and its over the top like bad acting,
Sinking ship and you're the captain, What you gonna do

All this abusing becoming amusing, the harsh reality becoming alluring,
The life I'm choosing won't stop moving and I'm refusing any kind of curing.
Cause see right now this papers moving and to be honest this papers ruling.
If God say's it's the demon I believe him, cause what I'm doing for him you could call appalling.
But there no such things as half way crook, so I pay cash and got my seat book,
As i approach the peer i got no fear,
Men women and especially gays.
I'm getting more lost by the day, the deeper I go the harder to find my way,
I know the blair witch I seen her yesterday, she collapsed naked on the bed with a needle in her crotches
And the baby sniffles as he watches, but that aint nothing new.
He's always sniffling, always got a cold, yea that's what crack'l do,
Peek a boo, I seen you, doing what your people's don't know you do,
But neither does mind and right now I'm not sure I mind cause right now I don't get my mind.

When life hits you with issues, makes you wanna cry and wet tissues,
Wondering who's really with you, what you gonna do,
When it gets all dramatic, and its over the top like bad acting,
Sinking ship and you're the captain, what you gonna do

What you gonna do when things,
Get on top just like a swing
And you tired of arguing, saying the same things
What you gonna do when things,
Get on top just like a swing
And you tired of arguing, saying the same things

Searching searching
I just been searching searching

OK, I can see you held it down and learnt patience,
Cause some reasons are without their explanations,
This is my song so let me explain the situation,
But wont air your business out girl, cause that's a bait ting,
I seen you at the station like its work your going,
Money have fe mek so just keep doing what you're doing,
It's crazy cause together we could have made g's,
Cause I did and truthfully you bright like me,
The only real difference is you slyer than me,
Your need for attention makes you attract the beef,
Ironically I use to say you were a bad cow,
You a funny little girl with a funny little style,
I know you heard the truth I know you read between the lines,
I might circle the truth but I will not tell a lie,
I remember the time I came your yard with a knife,
I don't wanna tek life but I would of tek life,
But im bigger than that now I can walk from a row,
My days on road has shown me life is like gold,
And plus this world is big enough for us both,
I know you was down I also know that you coped,
I hope that mean you learnt to slow your roll,
And keep your mouth closed,
A proper attitude is better than fancy close,
So as the chapter close that's how the story goes,
As I've grown I've learnt that friends turn to foes.

CHORUS
I heard you got your yard now
Fully grown now
It's not an armshouse
Cause I ovastand
Ovastanding is the key key
Ovastanding is the key key
I heard you got your car now
I seen you round town
It's not a armshouse
Cause I ovastand
Ovastanding is the key key,
Ovastanding is the key key

BRIDGE
I don't really care what you feel like
I aint got no time to waste on you
I don't really care what you wanna say
You can keep talking till your blue in the tooth

I'm getting older now starting to make sense of it,
Seeing the signs reading minds like hypnotist,
Understand the figures like arithmetics and my guess is,
People are bad mind,
Insecurity breads hate it's a fact find,
In fact im sure it's incurable,
Some people positive while some people are negative and totally oblivious to the harm they cause,
For every Malcom X there is a president bush,
For every ambitious soul, there's a coach potato,
Real said turn off the arcade man the games over,
This is the takeover taking the haters over,
Maybe if they had something else to do they wouldn't watch you,
Too busy with they bizz but now with kids having kids it's gonna get worse than this,
Only just realising what mama said,
By the sweat of mans brow he shall eat bread,
Stay focused on your path like a vegan dread,
And remember they hate to see you smile,
Your unique style, your everything there not,
If you sitting in a room with darkness and the lights come on
You'd have to cover your eyes, overstand the lines,
Check the paragraphs speaking in parables,
Call this the manual for caging animals the haters.

Im slowly billing up a savings every day
Although it's hard to save when you getting low pay
I stop shotting so my days are kinda quite
I quite like it there less violent with less lyings
I put in extra effort change up the gear on em
I got the sails up and I'm steering em
Im staying clear of em you know who I'm talking bout
It's unnecessary for their names to leave my mouth
Words are power so I manifest the thought
Everything I think is what I thought
Everything I thought is what I feel
Everything I feel is what I am
A woman with nuff tings brewing yea
I got a half cup of hope and im sippin slow
No more standing on the road cause that shit is old
I got no time for time wasting time is precious i only got time for studio session now.

CHORUS
Change in my mind move so consistently
Tend to find I spend my time much more productively
Use to try and exercise my immortality
Change contains to better days
But I forgot that my blood could clot my heart could stop

See, I been spending quite some time thinking bout life
And I been checking a couple things I need to get right
I been acting loose and not in every way
But in enough ways to put me in the wrong place
Or maybe the right place cause lessons learned in mistakes
And I been making some stupid decisions
Things were I was thinking man I wasn't thinking
Wasn't analysing checking the big picture yo
Same script but just a different cast but if I re-write the present thats the past
I'm dealing with the cards I'm dealt but im dealing with different cards
To be in a different place ain't hard
Or at least not as hard seem anyway
So if you don't see my face around the way just pray
Im doing better things and hopefully you can find them things inspiring seen

Im trying to hold down the smoke and the drink
And I'm trying to get in the gym amongst other things
When my phone rings I'm scared of answering
Cause the pull of the past is a proper hype ting
It's so alluring but I'm maturing so when I travel in on the train I by a ticket now
And when I'm ordering a drink I just sip it now
Im in no rush to go nowhere fast cause
Life seems when hell of a task so I better buckle up and sink the clutch on it fast quick

This is for the tat on my wrist this is for the black of my fist
This is for the s in my lisp this is for my beating heart in my chest on the life yes
Life aint for the swift but for those who can endure it so i hold it with two hands im moorish
And I answer every time it is calling and you can see it in my aura
You can tell I'm a soldier you can see the strength in my eyes and I hope
You can feel the strength in my vibe cause sometimes I get tired
Cause its hard out here yo,
See it all boils down to the have and the have not's the things that you have or you aint got
Some people are overweight some people aint got no food on the plate
You can act like you don't know or don't wanna know what's past Pluto
But if you heads in the pillow and your buts in the air, they gonna put it right there yo.

CHORUS
The world keeps spinning changing the lives or people in it
Nobody knows where it will take us
But if hope it gets better better better

Everyday read the metro soaring bills and high petrol
House prices and inflation and I'm not too sure what's happening
Cause they say these are tough times and I say you aint gotta tell me
Cause I'm tired of opening the papers I don't even watch the TV
But no matter what happens I'm still an artist
Attached so close mosses cant part this
Hercules aint got the strength to make me let go of these beats
Cause a long time now I been doing this
Writing songs since way back school kids
And the only thing that's changed is the weather I'm still holding it together hey
You can act like you don't know or you don't wanna know what's past Pluto
But if you heads in the pillow and you buts in the air they gonna put it right there yo

BRIDGE
One day I know that it
It will get better music is healing
I love the feeling
One day all people will be all equal
Until that day comes i'll just be singing my song

I watched you leave and it was hard to breath,
My chest got tight like I got asthma and I don't even smoke like that
But how can I take you back when, we don't even work like that
We can't see eye to eye when your here and when you not here things are unclear
The hardest thing is to say goodbye and even harder than that is to not start crying
My strength has not become my weakness cause I wish the truth was a lie
My head says no but my heart says yes,
My head tells me we aint having this
I hate you and love you at the same time, I got pain and love in the same rhymes
But I'm not the one with the ex, that won't stop ringing and sending txt
And you won't even tell her to stop, rather save her feelings than make me vex
This is my fault shouldn't known from the start, she wouldn't stop opening her legs
But that's what I get for going to good sex, good sex
Those pretty eyes tell such silly lies, you never say what you mean only what you want
And I hope for the best and end up looking dumb
This is so much harder than it needs to be, if I truly love you and you love me
Then that's all that should matter, you know what, it doesn't even matter cause
CHORUS
I don't want this to break my stride
I don't want this is to make me cry
Its best you leave now ok aright
Go then Go then Bye

I can't see you face on facebook cause were not friends on facebook
But still I wanna know if your cool and what your status says you been up too
Cause I was the one that said it couldn't carry on it was messing with my head
It was getting dread I was getting pains in my chest if you know what I mean say yes
And I really wish I never met you never wish I never caught feeling when I kiss you
16th floor of the Hilton singing just can't get you out my mind
And know I got you out my life im looking around like yea he's nice
Real nice but he isn't you, you could take him back to school
You seem to know everything that I like, like your programmed to satisfy my every delights
And your mind was right the right mind set and that's so hard to come by I wouldn't let you
Into my life unless you came correct but you stole my heart like a thief
Emptied me out like drum but I'm not silly or dumb so take you Xbox and go long
Those pretty eyes tell such silly eyes you never say what you mean only what you want
And I hope for the best and end up looking dumb but if I hope for the worst I end up looking wrong
This is so much harder than it needs to be, if I truly love you and you love me
Then that's all that should matter you know what it doesn't even matter cause

CHORUS

Daddy I think I love you cause I hate you so much that I must love you
I put mommy above you
cause she played her position and loved me unconditionally like you never have
I wasn't that bad I wasn't no Damien child the only way I could have been is cause you birth me
Hurt me scarred me so deeply I have trouble committing to any man cause I think he's gonna leave me Like you left me and mommy every birthday to see you would make me so happy
One day in the year and you couldn't come check me to busy to come check me
The way you affect me I'm constantly fighting to not affect me
I thought it was cool it didn't bother me I only realise like last week
I was talking to Shorts about slush puppies he mentioned my father and were was he
Subconsciously my head tilted like a lover that's been jilted
I speak painfully whenever I think of you my eyes start to squint whenever I vision you
Like the visions I see are visions of evil
But still I could be wrong in my visions of what your like
But I can't really remember what you look like

Chorus
I am daddy's little girl
That makes me tough
He never held my hand
I am daddy's little girl
That makes me tough
I hope you can understand

Have you never considered your old age flipping through the papers for the racing page
Looking at pennies to put a bet up in the bookies
Looking at women but too old for the nookie
Can't get a cookie out of any cookie jar your spars them pass on long time star
Wish you could spar with the spar them ca white rum by yourself it just cant get you charged
Looked upon by youths who pass you and barge like old man move these premonitions I give to you
Without any charge that's free old boy like a hug from you old boy
Like a kiss any the cheek saying how was school old boy or happy birthday me old boy
But still you're an old boy grey hair fill your head like an old man
When your hands them a shake who's gonna hold your hand
I guess it will be one of my eight siblings yea eight six different mothers straight
I didn't grow with them I hardly know them my flesh and my blood to me that's heart breaking
I wanna link them I hope they patience and ovastanding
To know when I'm standing face to face with them I feel abandoned
I see my father in the eyes and I just can't stand him

You can catch him sittin knowing that he's sinning
But knowing sinning gon give him what he's always missing
He starts to bill a spliff and slowing taking out the seeds
Slowing calculating how to perculate them p's
He's made a couple g's selling weed and selling e's
And to get it selling these he certainly moves neat
He rides his moped round the whole ends from dusk till dawn
He's got the weed head a pills heads lighting up his phone
He's got a ratchet that he loves to flick open and close
Hoping one day that it's gonna buss somebody clothes
Nobody really understands him nobody knows what's in his heart cause it never shows yo
He's got a dead beat dad, that beats his mum real bad
His mum sits home all day drinking and smoking fags
His mum said he aint shit probably do jail time and that's if he makes it to 25

CHORUS
Bad boy he's a bad boy

Catch him laying on his back getting head from cat listening to new rap like 50 and that
Word for word reciting like he's the real writer
Or shadow boxing in the mirror like a real fighter
The reason he's hurt is now lost like a lighter
The pain in his heart gets him drunk as mother yo
He gets another call then puts it in his balls
He passes the poster of 2pac on his bedroom wall
He don't really stop and cotch with the man dem
He said them man are waste man them man are loose cannons cause
They got the rebors he's got the real ting
He got the 38 with the grip and the case to put it in
He'd kill for his kicks or his whips or his friends
He'd kill for his dad even though he hates him
He'd kill for the reason of killing cause killings in
And he'd kill if opportunity rings

CHORUS

See his priorities are messed up, if he doesn't realise that then his luck'll be up
Cause he wants to be remembered like Tony Montana
But he's forgetting that he'll end up dead like Tony Montana
Life is a game and he's playing to lose he aint knowing the rules thinking they don't apply to him
But its love yea and it's the love that will keep him
Keep him filled to the brim although he's living in sin
His mind believes he's a product of the things he's sees
Nobody told him he's a free as the air he breathes
As simply as it sounds this is history he aint the first and he won't be the last
Cause I've seen a few going nowhere fast yea
I've seen a few going nowhere fast
A life upraised is a life unsure always looking for help but expecting closed doors that why he's

CHORUS

I walk the night street with lost souls
We converse in common codes
So unload our desires and wishes
Sparking spliffs is more than a stimulant its how assimilate
Like at the back of the class charge it's only us
Teaches don't like it but they don't fight it instead they ignore it
We get no grades but don't look fazed when the exams come
It's like whatever act like it don't matter only mummy's face make you teeth chatter
And I remember when they told me I'll never make it
Too smart for my own good I get rude when they use there authority to abuse
I'm born to prove that rules were made for the obedience of fools
And guidance was made for the wise so I get advice for those who live full and colourful lives
And think twice while watching what they tell I on they teli-vision yea
I see the way they pronounce the nouns
And listen to the way the vowels sound
Subliminal messages are allowed and executed by executives
Who throw pennies to beggars at London Bridge them is hypocrites

Those wheels are in motion
Those wheels keep on turning
Those wheels are in motion
Those wheels keep on turning

I walk the day streets in odd clothes with a cupboard full of new clothes that cost loads
But if you new the real me then you would no so
Old habits are now so so sales don't excite me like the use to
I find myself excited by sunsets but don't see them much
I'm use to cold months and its getting chilly now
I'm born and bred in south in a cook food house
My granny use to send a plate of food for the neighbour
But now I argue with neighbours for music played loud
And their kinky behaviour can be heard in my house
But build a house on a house you take the privacy out
Move the poor people in and then the rich move out
The working class keep the system moving but seem to be systematically loosing
Given no choices who can be choosing they saying use your vote
But I've checked out the parties and I've looked around
So if I vote for a choice then will my vote count
I am the silent vote so hear my voice now
Try and digest the truth but don't choke now and with the truth I bless this food

I got the magic touch the magic potion
And nothing powerful like words spoken
All together now the wheels in motion
All together now the wheels in motion

Life is learn live that's all it is
I been from school to kicked out sixth form to kicked out
Mums to kicked out doors don't open much
It's more like a bum rush I'm quick to throw thumps
I'm tired of the kicking come and sweet this
I'm not crying but I'm afraid to show pain I let it rain and nourish the soil I'm growing everyday
I'm like genesis and it begin with this
From the womb to the tomb I'll be writing in my room
Inspiration I'm looking but it will come soon
Cause I notice I'm affected at the site of full moons
As is above so is below as I get the call I'm ready to go I pick up the phone and
Let the lyrics be my speech therapy and let it all be married to the melody and let it carry me

I been working round about 3 months and
It don't feel like I've achieve much its
Not that its wrong but it don't feel right in front of my computer I'm ready to take flight
I know it's not just me we all want more flooded with the daily task that we ignore
If I could I'd let the sea caress my shore I'd give praise to the wind and the sum I'd adore
Cause under the full moons blossom black orchids bloom
In the bottom of bare barrels were theres barely room
Cause in towns were shots like cartoons for everyone that's dropped one will get through
It's the balance of life the equilibrium
In this game of life I am just another one

Sometime life moves slow like the hour hand
But the hour hand determines the time and I
Definitely determine my life small steps or big strides right
And I might be under pressure daily
Cause money keeps on hiding from me
It's funny even though the jokes on my happiness is free check the irony
But things must get better after every storm comes good weather
After every tear drop comes a release that's why I'm head over heel for these beats
I love these words rhythm and melody
Its heaven on earth forget what you heard its heaven on earth forget what you heard

The screams from my alarm scares the sleep from me
It's my sleep thief it steals dreams from me
It's an invention invented with the intention of compelling
The most innocent of women to start swearing
I got a word with four letters to describe all the bullshit I heard on these four days of work
Jackie from HR is soon to give birth so there backed up like brick wall or black boys on a curb
Or at least that's why I heard anyway outside in the smokers haunt earlier today
Until light rain landing right on my b&h the water that wetted it made it hard to inhale
Four minutes more life is what a smoker would say like Jackie in admin who drinks 2 litres a day
I know this because a little game I like to play
I waste time and gaze at the water cooler but today is my bestest day of the week so far
It starts with f and ends with liquor
For tonight we laugh we joke and play hard

CHORUS
Every day it is the same show my boss is an a hole but I'm on the pay role so I guess I'll just stay

Can I tell time is what he know wants to know
I'm suppose to start at nine but its nine two 0
But it's not my fault it's the fault of Blair cause I went to the bus stop and there weren't no bus there
So I went to the train station and guess what I saw
People doing kung fu just to get through the doors
Started fighting cussing and pulling hair and you know that I'm farse so I was staying there
But now he's looking at me like I'm a liar but if he calls me that then I will get fired
Cause even though it's true I won't except that no name calling that was in my contract
But I'm a good worker file all my files on time
Don't get my files mixed up with files that's not mine
Printed on both sides are the correct codes
And if he act like he don't know the I'll make him know
But today is my bestest day of the week by far
It starts with an f and ends with liquor for tonight we laugh we joke and play hard

Your tender touch is a must you got me paralysed
All I can do is curve my back and close my eyes
If our love had a soundtrack it be made from sighs
Produce written and arrange on a sweet vibe
Complete my sentence like a set of twins our love evoke a message like the new testament
My love medicine and I aint trippin its pure love I'm giving
You aint just my lover but you my bredrin
You, your such a vivrant thing so full of life your like a vivrant thing
You bring me to life you got me doing mad things
You cloud my mind like I been smoking
Your the very reason that I believe in love if I believe enough than I can learn to trust
And on the way there I let you beat it up
Not speaking literally it's just a matter of speech
CHORUS
You are my buddy, you my buddy
You are my buddy, you my buddy
And I think I'm falling for my buddy
I think I'm falling for my buddy
He is my buddy he my buddy
He is my buddy he my buddy
And I think I'm falling for my buddy
I think I'm falling for my buddy

Our current affairs are matters for the mind
When I'm with you I have no concept of time
I can speak my mind my chakras realign
You ignite the spark in the hottest part of me
You touch the realms of speech I speak in tongues
And when we ready to come we come one
I laugh a lot you bring me so much fun you tell me that you lucky but I'm the lucky one
Cause I'm a different type of chick a shift brick chick
And I'm used to rolling with brothers who cock sticks
Love for me is such an armshouse ting cause the outside forces means it stays a fling
But its happening and I feel so alive for the very first time you make me wanna swear
Make me wanna jump from the front to the rear
Pull up the hand brake and we can do it right here
CHORUS
My buddy, my buddy buddy look what we started, started started
I get the call and I'm living on the phone
Cause we be on the phone till six in the mourning
Talking all day and loving all night pure argument I'm a give and them argument me like
Cause I'm an mc and I appreciate lyrics and he appreciate the way I give it

My quiet observations on the bus city people lost trust
Maudleys out patients are shouting with the pavements
They looking rough can't get to grips so they end up looking worse than shit
Maybe if I can see who there talking too I might talk to them to so they can prove
The spirit never lies but before I get to try the clouds open up and let god cry
Why is this white lady nervous cause 3 black youths come on so she checking were her purse is
Make me feel nervous like they aint my country like they don't really want me
But mummy always love me I never had a daddy it was me and my mummy
Mummy was my daddy I can either cry or see it as funny
How you can have a child and then just leave
Now I'm walking around with my heart on my sleeve cause I'm effected anytime anybody leave
You can see my scars and hear my silent screams
I been reading books to analyse my dreams and to me it seems
The only chance we get to make sense of it is when we put our heads down a little bit
That's why I'm spittin it cause each one teach one and you can take it how you want don
CHORUS
Right now I got a lot of work to do
I gotta smooth out my edges
Eat more vedges
Listen to my elders
Vibe with my peers
Confront my fears and
Finish this album
Right now I got a lot of work to do
I gotta represent the youth
Speak more truth
Eat more fruit
Get wise with my years
Confront my fears and
Finish this album

But it seems I get side tracked it's like a mind trap I get a call real late bout were the foods at
Cause certain man a certain place got certain food to taste so my Nikes are laced
And I was never really one to stay awake through a working day for them little bit pay yo
This nine to five is just killing me slowly but quitting is for quitters so I wait until they fire me
But now no one will hire me cause I got more lies in my CV than a pro's had STD's
When will they see I was born to reign entrapment is my pain I need to feel alive again
I need a man that compliments my stride ovastand I'm this way until I die
Has ambitions of his own so ovastand i don't wanna be alone I just need a little time in my zone
This one goes out to my shotters in the alleys were all brothers and sisters were all family
All my sisters trying to raise there babies all the youth man with court cases crazy
It's like the smarter you are the bigger your worries stupid people are lucky trust me
This one goes out to my people with ambition I'm still learning I'm still trying but for now

Honesty is courage and since I got the heart of a lion then there's no sense in lying
I portray my life over violins no matter what it brings least I'm being real
When I look at my future I fear failure I fear the fact that you might not like me
I know I'm skilled but just maybe slightly what if my light don't shine so brightly
I'm scared of that I'm telling you the truth I'm scared of that
What if the doctor said you couldn't have children
What if the system they tried to topple what I'm billing better living for all my ghetto children
And I don't mean were you live I mean your state of mind
Cause ghettos not just a place ghetto is a vibe
And I don't need no boastie words or complicated flows
If I know what I gotta do then I flow
But sometimes I get tired sometimes I lose faith I guess that's the reason that we got to church
Cause when you at the bottom of the barrel it hurts need something to believe in and God works You think spiritual is just hocus pocus what you really saying is you have not noticed
Inside us all is a silent protest you can acknowledge or ignore but me

I made some mistakes in my life that I'm not proud of see
And I hope that doesn't mean now I'm trying it will be harder for me
I been hurt and its not an excuse but it's a reason
It's like some things happen in life for a lifetime or a season
And I'm just now learning how this world really works
There's a law that says you get back what you put forth
All this running around doing nothing aint good for me man
Its stupidity so this mirrors up and it's looking at me
I'm sorry mum for all the times that I made you cry
And its been said before in songs but you are my life
So if you really wanna move away and not work so hard
How can I tell you know this is my blessings mum
And you don't have to worry about me I'm doing music now
It's the truth it's from my heart I hope it makes you proud
I haven't made you proud in such a long long time
That's why I'm gonna stand by gran as long as I'm alive
Nobody's gonna hurt her even though there trying
And nobody's gonna hurt you ever as long as this sun shines
And hell would have to freeze over before I take that back
This is my speech therapy, this isn't rap

I'm not there yet I'm still trying to fix my faults
Trying to pick sense from nonsense that's what I was taught
So many roads I've walked I've learnt so much so many thoughts
Bout who I really wanna be I guess it's now I'm sure
I just wanna be love it takes a lot to say that
Cause I don't wanna be judged please don't judge me wrong
Even though I judge my father through a whole song
He's just a man I need to be mature and understand
Frenchie stay on this earth longer please
I can't believe your dying I can keep from crying
You mean a lot to me I owe you this whole album
I owe so many this album I owe the world man
I use to think the world owed me that's why I gained nothing
Use to feel sorry for myself man I tell you something
The day I changed my life is the day I learned pain is love
What I went through is my strength and that's what keeps me up
So I'll keep this fire burning lighting up my life
And to everyone who believes in me I'll do you right
Starting here today with these words on this paper back
I understand this is my speech therapy this aint rap