Shawn Mullins Album

She slees with the windows open
yet she's still locked safe inside
and to block out the sounds of the city's commotion
she turns her fan up on high
yea she lives just far enough away from home
to see the whole scene
and down the street the kids throw sticks and stones
and end up on the the TV screen
yea they throw their sticks and stones
and end up on the TV screen
and she used to walk on these gracefully
but now they crunch beneath her feet
I guess she must be changin'
there's just no way to keep it neat
and her father still barks like a soldier
returning from victory
but now eh's much older
and that bark isn't as scary as it used to be
yea she watches his self torture
no one left to abuse but himself
but still her memory scorches her
and she struggles to love herself
her memory scorches her
and she struggles to love herself
and she used to walk on these gracefully
but now they crunch beneath her feet
and I guess she must be changin'
she never was to good at stayin' in her seat
and this town grows hungry and restless
hungry for what I ain't sure
but they're sweepin' the streets of the trash and the homeless
and raisin' the rent
and breakin' the poor
and I used to walk on these gracefully
but now they crunch beneath my feet
and I guess I must be changin'
there's just no way to keep it neat
I used to walk on these gracefully
I guess I must be changin'...

Mormon's are everwhere
Battalions of bicycling bachelors
With dark suits
And well cropped hair
We're mormons too
Have been since '72
I'm riding between my brother and sister
In the back seat of a '67 buick station wagon
With red vinyl seats
We stick by each other
And to those seats
We've been eating cheese and bacon sandwiches
Our mother made for thirteen days straight in the august heat
And both my siblings are wakin' on those eggshells
As I will soon learn how to do myself
They play their quiet silly games
With their peashooters
As I sip luke-warm sprite from a tin can
Sold to me by a hunchback silly bastard old woman
A hundred miles back
Who is probably the only person with good sense
In this part of the country
I still don't know what to do god-awful bacon and cheese sandwich
But your body is your temple
God tells us so,
So drink up your milk


And reap what you sow
I mold the cheese and bacon sandwich into a ball in my hand
It kind of reminds me of play-dough
I look around to see who is watchin'
And stuff it between the red vinyl seats
No one will find it
At least not for a couple of weeks
We're in this big place now
It's kind of like 1/2 of an blue plastic easter egg shell
And there's a hole in the top
Where the sun cuts through
And lights up the room
And I hear all these male voices
Telling me that black people are inferior
And it's ok to have more than one wife
And as the dry dry breath of the utah sun warms me
I stand before a statue of jesus that is far too big
And has held these folks hostage for so so long
And I gaze up at the nostrils of the sandstone savior
And wonder if it
Can smell all this bullshit
Cause I sure can
And I'm only 5 years old
In salt lake city
In 1973...

Young Johnny
he really had a way
he did his homework on the schoolbus
and always got an A
and the girls like Johnny
more than anyone except maybe Elton John
later on in high school
he couldn't keep his red suspenders on
oh where's Johnny
has he gone away
oh where's Johnny
will he back back someday
He had a room full of trophies
from the track meets and tennis games he'd win
he was a full blown whiz kid
bound to be a Renaissance man
then he went on off to college
got his head stuck in a different state of mind
when they asked him was it alcohol
he told 'em it was nothin' of the kind
just life
just life Mom
oh where's Johnny
has he gone away
oh where's Johnny
will he back back someday
but Johnny's alright
he just turned out his lights
they'd have paid it no mind
had he not been so bright
he opened up his eyes
and snapped out in a groove
he saw both sides of everthing
and found he could not move
Johnny moved back home
now he reads a lot of poetry and plays
he'll sit out in the backyard
and not say a word to anyone for days
and his folks gave up
they no longer even bother gettin' through
he's 30 odd years old
I guess they figured there's just so much you can do
his mother keeps his pictures
in the scrapbook in the drawer with her pearls
and she polishes the trophies
that he won back when they thought he'd save the world
back when the girls liked Johnny
more than anyone except maybe Elton John
she wonders wheres her little boy
with the braces and the red suspenders gone
just life
just life Mom
just life
just life...

As the lights go down
the drumming clown
whistled a melody
and as the rain pours down
his happy face
turned into a sad one
the autumn wind reminded him
that the circus had come and gone
so he opened a pack of swisher sweets
and whistles down the first one
his clothes are ragged
and his hat is dusty
his drum is missing snares
he maybe laughin and he may be cryin
but no one knows nor cares
his belly's empty
but his heart is full
he knows where he belongs
so he steps aboard that lovely train
and he whitsles his favorite song
and as he sleeps
he dreams of all the pretty girls
he's seen throughout his life
and though his dreams are sweet
his aching feet
awake him in the night
he wakes to the sound of thunder
and he thinks of a reason why
then he hangs his head to cry
then he drifted off to a deeper sleep
that no one could disturb
and when he woke
he was at a place that was higher than the birds
he said my God I'm here at last
is this meant to be
I've lived the life of a hobo clown
whistle tunes for money
and his Lord spoke up
and said my friend
you are not alone
you've lived a good life my drumming clown
and now you have a home
and somewhere a stockboy opens a crate
and finds the butt of an old cigar
he hears a distant whistling
then he gazes as the stars

Ruth and Mary
Threw a party
everyone was there
Baby Ruth she got a new tatoo
and Mary braided an orchid in her hair
their friend had a farm
and in that same friend's barn
under the stars above
they said their vows
and there was no doubt
this was an everlasting love
and Ruth says
Ah, loves gotta hold on me
Ah, it just won't let me be
My brothers and my sisters
will you ever see
the truth that's shared in Ruth and Mary
some folks say
its the sinners way
to live and love alike
but they can't feel
this loves is real
they say that kind of love ain't right
and Mary says
Ah, loves gotta hold on me
Ah, it just won't let me be
My brothers and my sisters
will you ever see
the truth that's shared in Ruth and Mary
Ruth and Mary on the freeway
tunnel vision Mexico
windows down
through the border towns
and Ricky Lee on the radio
singin' it's your last chance
pullin' out of that last chance Texaco
and Ruth says
Ah, loves gotta hold on me
Ah, it just won't let me be
and my brothers and my sisters
we may never see
the truth that's shared in Ruth and Mary..

See the ruin on the hill
where the smoke is hangin still
like an echo of an age long forgotten
theres a story of a home
crushed beneath those blackened stones
and the roof that fell before the beams were rotten
Cecil Darby loved his wife
and he labored all his life
to provide her with material possessions
and he built for her a home
of the finest wood and stone
and the building soon became his sole obsession

oh it took 300 days
for the timbers to be raised
and the silhouette was seen from miles around
and the gables reached as high
as the eagles in the sky
but it only took one night to bring it down
when Darby's castle tumbled to the ground

though they shared a common bed
there was precious little said
in the moments that were set aside for sleepin'
for his busy dreams were filled
with the rooms he'd yet to build
and he never heard young Helen Darby weepin'
then one night he heard a sound
as he layed his pencil down
and traced it to her door and turned the handle
and the pale light of the moon
through the window of the room
split the shadows where two bodies lay entangled

oh it took 300 days
for the timbers to be raised
and the silhouette was seen from miles around
and the gables reached as high
as the eagles in the sky
but it only took one night to bring it down
when Darby's castle tumbled to the ground

Joshua was an old man
his beard like mountain snow
and when I was a boy we'd have jam sessions
I'd sneak off to old Sharptop
with my guitar I would go
when I should have been at school
learnin' my lesson
and I'd sip a little moonshine
and I'd smoke a corncob pipe
and we'd pick all day until our fingers bled
and right around supper time
I'd run home in the night
just in time to get a whippin' from my Dad
oh way back when
he was 65 and I was 10
and I will never be as free again
oh way back when
the summer flew by quickly
and Josh and I spent out time
writing words to songs from memories of his past
he'd tell me bout the way it was
and I'd find the perfect rhyme
and I couldn't believe how we wrote our songs so fast
I never knew an old man
could be so full of life
the love we had was so hard to explain
and I remember how the tears fell when he spoke of his late wife
and I'd give him my 6-string to ease his pain
oh way back when
he was 65 and I was 10
and I will never be as free again
oh way back when
and then in late November
I knocked on his cabin dor
I knocked and knocked but Joshua never came
and I still remember
how he layed there on the floor
and I went home cryin' in the rain
oh way back when
he was 65 and I was 10
and I will never be as free again
oh way back when
oh way back when
oh way back when

Let me touch you
Put my hands on you
I'll kiss you
And we'll see things through
Would you lay with me
Would you lay with me
'Till the sun peaks through the blinds
We can stay right here
'Till our heads are clear
We can lose all track of time

You are silenced
By your memory
And if I lose you
I lose a part of me
'Cuz I can save the world
I can save the world
But I just can't save myself
So I write these lines
Metaphores and rhymes
'Till I think of something else
Is there really nothing else

I am here now
You've got the best of me
So have no fear now...go ahead
Take the rest of me
'Cuz there are two of us
There are two of us
It's the cycle of our souls
Yet we try and change
And rearrange
The way the story's told
That's the way the story goes...

My ship up here is sinkin'
But this is what I am
And I'd tell you what I'm thinkin'
If I thought you'd give a damn
And I don't know a single one of you
But you feel like a winter's rain
Tell me would listen to the words I speak
If I knew you all by name
It's niether here nor there
Cause I still wake up in my hotel room
With this smokey barroom in my clothes and hair
Every night is different
Every night's the same
Ain't if funny how each of us
Has his own way to kill the pain
Makes me think of my friend jimmy
Who never could behave
He bought a gator skateboard
With the money that he saved
He rode that 4 wheeled sufrin' board around
Till he was old enough to shave
Then it was replaced by a '69 lasabre
He'd putter off to schol
As fast as that thing would get
And all the kids would say


Here comes jimmy in that beat up piece of shit
He used to take up 2 whole spaces
In the senior parking lot
Yea now jimmy's doin' seven years
For stickin' up a subway sandwhich shop
So crawl beneath your words
Say what's on your mind
Tell it like it is
Don't get stuck behind
Cause it's the truth you know,
That gets you by
It's not who or what you know,
It's why
So straddle that old fencepost
And fade it down to nothing
And you'll see
You might see
That my ship up here is sinkin'
But this is what I am
And I'd tell you waht I'm thinkin'
If I thought you gave a damn
So take this in or don't
I don't really care
You will or you won't
2 choices in the air...

She never loses
She never chooses
I don't know which way is up
I drink her down
She fills my cup again
I'm always changin'
while she's rearrangin'
I can't tell you how I feel
except I know this love's for real
She gives me orders
She's tearin' down my borders
and I don't know which way is up
I drink her down
She fills my cup again
She...

Be good to you
take care of you
shake loose of those self-help blues
you gotta lot of livin' to do
can't be givin' up on you
sometimes the stars or the moon gonna play a trick on you
and I will try to believe what you tell me
and I will try to be true to my self
cause I'm as free as I ever will be
so don't be tryin' so hard
don't be feelin' discarded
just feel that love surround
cause there's a whole lot there
a whole lot waitin' to be shared
there's still enough to go around
and I will try to believe what you tell me
and I will try to be true to myself
caues I'm as free as I ever will be
but where do I begin
is there god within
sometimes I'm not so sure
so won't you teach to me
but keep it simple please
would you help a friend who's feeling low
would you help a friend who's feeling low...

Sharing with us what he knows
His shining eyes are big and blue
And all around him water flows
This world to him is new
This world to him is new

To touch a face
To kiss a smile
And new eyes see no race
The essence of a child.....the essence

Chorus:
He's born to shimmer
He's born to shine
He's born to radiate
He's born to live
He's born to love
But we will teach him how to hate

And true love it is a rock
Smoothed over by a stream
And no tickin of a clock
Truly measures what thet means
Truly measures what that means

And this thing called our time
I heard a brilliant woman say
She said "you know it's crazy
How I want to try to capture mine"
I think I love this woman's way
I think I love this woman

The way she shimmers
The way she shines
The way she radiates
The way she lives
The way she loves
The way she never hates

Sometimes I think of all this that surrounds me
I know it all as being mine
But she kisses me and she wraps herself around me
She gives me love
She gives me time
And I feel fine

But time I cannot change
So here's to looking back
You know I drink a whole bottle
Of my pride
And I toast to change
To keep these demons off my back
Just get these demons off my back

Cause I
Want to shimmer
I want to shine
I want to radiate
I want to live
I want to love
I want to try and learn how not to hate
Try not to hate

We're born to shimmer,
We're born to shine,
We're born to radiate,
We're born to live,we?re born to love
We're born to never hate

He's born to shimmer
He's born to shine
He's born to radiate
He's born to live
He's born to love
But we will teach him..

If the timing's right
no need to worry about what's right and what is wrong
and if the market's right
we can sell the livin' hell out of your song
cause I know what they wanna hear
yea I can see the light
but just a few adjustments dear
change the way you sing
the way you play
the way you write
and if my mood is right
I'll give you money or support whichever's less
not sure the image is right
I think for starters we should put you in a dress
cause we are patrons of the arts
yea we believe in you and what it is you do
but just remember parts is parts
we'll see what sticks
I hope for your sake it will be you
and if the price was right
I'd sell the soul of my own mother in a shake
and that I can't deny
I wonder how much money could I make
what are you complaining for
it's simply economics
you still got your vocal chords
so get the hell out of my office
and write me some hits,
write me some hits,
I don't hear no hits,
I don't hear no hits...

look away,
look away from the past
think ahead,
think ahead so you'll last another day
and the days are so long
and you'll get by
but gettin' by is just another way to say half dead
and you think you'd rather live your life instead
of just gettin' by
don't you know,
don't you know its bound to keep you up all night
wonderin' where and how it all went wrong that night
it all went wrong
so keep in mind
keep in mind you're not to blame
bitter tears
bitter tears can fall like rain
on your frields
and those fields need that rain
so look away
and think ahead
and live your life
and cry those tears
cry bitter tears...