You can cut to the chase
And you know its okay
Coz we only read the headlines
We only read the headlines
Baby get to the point
And quit the full play
We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines anyways
54% of bank robberies take place on a Friday
Women blink nearly twice as much as men
Elvis never ever gave an encore
The number of wars fought between countries
That both have at least one McDonalds is zero
Every 5 minutes an area of rainforest the size of a foot ball field
Is eliminated
Women who read romance novels
Have sex twice as often as those who don’t
Did you know?
A can of diet coke will float in water
While a can of regular coke will sink
The Muppet show was banned from TV in Saudi Arabia
Because one of its stars was a pig
Males on average think about sex
Every 7 seconds
More than 50% of the people in the world have never made
Or received a telephone call
Syphilis has risen 500% in the last six years in London
Why is it that everybody seems to get older?
Except for Cliff Richard
You can cut to the chase
And you know its okay
Coz we only read the headlines
We only read the headlines
Baby get to the point
And quit the full play
We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines anyways
1 out of 10 girls under 20 is carrying Chlamydia
According to several sources
Dr. Harvey Kellogg tried to make a cure for masturbation
When he made cornflakes
Women are 30% more active during a full moon
Indonesia is the country with the highest scout membership
In every single episode of Seinfeld
There’s a superman in at least one scene somewhere
If you weighed all the animals in the world
Hens would be 10% of the total weight
In Minnesota there’s a law
That prevents men from having sex with living fish
Jimmy Carter can read 2000 words per minute
Humans and dolphins are the only species
That has sex for pleasure
Danny deVito is taller than Dolly Parton
You can cut to the chase
And you know its okay
Coz we only read the headlines
We only read the headlines
In the papers on the news
Heavens heard there’s no excuse
In formations everywhere
All you need to know is right here
It’s possible to attend your own funeral
Because the human brain continues to send out electrical wave signals
For up to 37hours following death
We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines
You can cut to the chase
And you know its okay
Coz we only read the headlines
We only read the headlines
Baby get to the point
And quit the full play
We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines anyways
Switch to Russian 
