 I smoke weed with Pamela Lee
I gave her a bong hit, she gave me Hep C.
Hit the beach with Val Kilmer
Surf Malibu, then went out for dinner.
And Robert Downey Jr.
Goin' back to county in the immediate future.
Who da biggest mac ever (to) fuck Jennifer Conolley
In her requiem?
And I don't just fuck thespians
I fuck lesbians.
Like Ellen Degeneres.
And Nicole Ritchie
You look so skinny, don't visit the Windy City.
Penny Marshall
Look like a aardvark gave birth to a gargoyle.
I hold my own.
Ram-bone bitches like Sly Stallone.
And what about Bono?
Tryin' to save the world. You should be fuckin' models.
I'm a Party Monster.
Got Macaully Culkin doin' blow in my hottub.
Who got the drugs?
Lindsay Lohan or Courtney Love?
Hey Matthew My-God-I'm-Gay.
Put ya fuckin' shirt on, this ain't the gay parade.
Renee Zellweger. Enough botox. You look like a elf ninja.
You got to be kiddin.
Is that Jeremy Piven or a bald gay midget?
LA is like groundhog's day
same old shit never fuckin' rains.
droppin names, what a shame.
Never thought I'd turn out this way.
LA is like groundhog's day
same old shit never fuckin' rains.
droppin names, what a shame.
Never thought I'd turn out this way.
I'm on a bone'n bonanza.
Accidentally crossed swords with Tony Danza.
Anna Nicole Smith
It wasn't the pills, she OD'd on my Dick.
And I was in Colorado
When Kobe slid his beef in that blonde hoe.
Christina Ricci gave me a reach around
her eyes were creepy.
And I been feedin' Alpo to that bird lookin dog, Gwenyth Paltrow.
You talkin' to me?
Fuck Robert Deneiro, my meat bring the heat.
I'm a hopeless romantic.
Shove a rose in your asshole, Scarlett Johannsen.
Toby McGuire.
Homee, you ain't a man or a spider.
And you a jive turkey
For fuckin trannies, Mr. Eddie Murphy.
I heard John Travolta
Blows little boys in his convertible porsche.
Danny Masterson got a curly bush
he full of estrogen.
And Wilder Valderama
Is the luckiest Gutamalan from Tiajuana.
And Will Smith, I'm the man in black
Packin' the white dick.
I'm sick of these chumps.
You're fired, Donald Trump.
LA is like groundhog's day
same old shit never fuckin' rains.
droppin names, what a shame.
Never thought I'd turn out this way.
LA is like groundhog's day
same old shit never fuckin' rains.
droppin names, what a shame.
Never thought I'd turn out this way.
Spoken:
Screw L.A.
Straight up.
This place ain't nothin' but fake breasts and pollution.
The only callback I had in the last 6 months was to the doctor.
About to fire my agent.
Yo, all you Hollywood actors out there who think you're hard: you're not.
OK? Don't play the role and get caught out there baby.
Dirt Nasty.
2006 and forever.
What?
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