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06/04/2002 |
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Blow the last candle out. Let the wax harden
I wish I could stop crying. And I wish that someone still loved me [x2]
Just breathe and focus. How can I when the air is so cold and empty,
That my lungs froze right in my chest.
I'll be honest the silver linings are getting harder and harder to manufacture
And the smiles are so difficult to fake.[x2]
What do I have to do, or who do I have to kill, to get what I want. What I
need[x2]
Happiness is an emotion I was born to this world without,
nothing pleases me. And I can never be satiated.
Through this toil I will breed my own distress and destroy my best hopes,
fuck up the only things that I love.
I watched my aspirations crashing to the ground, on the backs of the angels that
I've slain.
But I meant so well, I tried so hard, gave everyting in my soul, to what end, to
what end
. . .
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Yesterday I forgot to breathe for like the 6th time this week.
maybe it was the pink cloud strafed sky that changed my mind and brought me back
seems like every day it's kill or be killed...
with all this anger there is no time to inhale and progress
and catch the smell of something that you once knew.
have you ever stopped raised your face up to the sun and screamed
let it out exhale the pain
that strangulates your soul, when will I be free
my lungs take in the fragrance of remorse, what is the cost, am I living,
if you let your lungs fill up with pain then you will drown in your own regret.
.my arms feel so numb my heart palpitates missing a beat.
the blood freezing in my veins. the taste of rust in my mouth.
But today I just threw it all away
.though the light burns my eyes I will not be blind,
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It's so hard to see when your eyes are rolling in the back of your head
It's even harder to speak when everything you say just comes out wrong
Gutted like a pig, all you want is the world to bleed, someone somewhere stole
your desire
The pain akin to, being punched in the throat, and stabbed in the chest
You would rather bleed than be without her
Gone are the tender whispers dancing in your ears
Replaced with lackluster memories you cry, your screams play in your empty room
It's so hard to see when your eyes are rolling in the back of your head
It's even harder to speak when everything you say just comes out wrong
Your bed swallows you whole as the days bleed together, torment on the lips
Of a loved one, and if you try hard enough,
you can almost taste her, feel her pass and
Scream, OH GOD WHY ME
You would rather bleed than be without her
Gone are the tender whispers dancing in your ears
Replaced with lackluster memories you cry, your screams play in your empty room
It's so hard to see when your eyes are rolling in the back of your head
. . .
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Raise up the ghosts of the dead - I won't die like them
Push past the point of raw emotion - I will breathe
Exist with a broken spirit - I will die complete
Ignore what the angels say enjoy that special place where the demons speak to me
I won't pick out the lining of my coffin yet unless I am sure that color satin
is me
Better yet go with crushed velvet, that way I'll be damn sure to enjoy eternity
My daily life writes the eulogy, engraved on tombstone diaries
laid to rest with the passing of time
Seems to me that even love can die
And the rituals, that fade away, and the roses that cease to be laid
And to me it clearly appears that we're already one foot in a very shallow grave
I will love with passion
You live like you're dead
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Coward, the next time you want to fuck me over stab me in the front
Can I still see my future in your eyes,
or can I picture myself dead in your embrace
And your cruel crimson red smile, kills
Everyone cared about you. Why couldn't you
Instead your greed compelled you to steal other silver linings.
No one could have their moments free from your withering touch.
Fuck off like you're the only person that has ever cried or been broken by love
Spare me your pity party drunk off your own misfortunes
Wallowing in your blissful melancholy
.can you taste my blood. You knew that this would kill me. But you carried on
and on
with your selfish shit., everyone cared about you. Why couldn't you
instead your greed compelled you to steal other silver linings.
burnt down my world, you killed my hope
spread out the ash and walked away
how could you just close off your eyes.
turn tail and run, you are the greatest coward
damn right I am still pissed..
next time I see you we will see who has the upper hand
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Starving searching this barren wasteland
Trying to grasp being this alone
Pleading for a breath of fresh air, someone's standing on my chest
Dying I'm asphyxiating myself
Break myself slave to my weakness choke on my words
Oh I'm drowning and I feel so alone
The lights are on and I wish I was home
My lips are screaming pretty nothings
My ears are bleeding for want of words, fuck words I need actions
Hope as left me fucking shattered
Someone's standing on my chest
Alone would be a pleasant change from here
How do you gauge loneliness how you ever felt so alone
It feels like the light will never reach me here
I am choking back my longing for shed tears
So strangulated by my lonesome fears plead
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Lift up a stone and you will find him,
cherish the beauty in the world around us
Not in buildings or crosses made by man
Judge me, fuck you, stop playing god,
Your forked tongue prophecies,
carelessly caressing the wounds of the weak
People like you should be crucified,
then maybe just maybe you would have an idea
Of what you are talking about.
My only solace is that one day,
judgment will come for the wicked, then we will see who burns
Raise up your head, unclasp your hands,
your weakness makes me tremble
True strength comes from within
And we were given this life to live,
not exist under standards, set by some bullshit rule book
What prayers of yours, were ever answered, by degrading others
Spare me your biblical back peddling nonsense
For the people that you've hurt, and the being your dishonor,
Your fall from grace, will finally justify my means
Judge me and now you are me and what's worse
You are now a traitor to your god
Tell me Judas, how does it feel to be looked down upon
Sinners like you, should be stung up from the highest tree
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Crystal clear I see the rose is frail
The thorns hide easily in its beauty
As I go to grasp it in my hand
My heart is torn beating from my chest
Let me be captivated
By your beauty
Then let me fall from your grace
Unto my broken knees
Close My eyes so tightly
The tears are welling up
You aren't worth the waste
Of the salt or the water
Fuck all your false beauty
It was transparent just like your smile - liar
Your thorns caress my flesh
Crimson Drops on a snowy field - liar
I have watched you retrogress
I have seen what you've become - liar
Take your eyes off of me
Its funny how fast blue eyes fade gray - liar
Let me be captivated By your beauty
Then let me fall from your grace
Unto my broken knees
Close My eyes so tightly
The tears are welling up
You aren't worth the waste
Of the salt or the water
And you are deceit
Watching the sun play in your hair
I couldn't really care, care any less about you
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I am the walking dead heartbreaker, my apologies,
I'm happy you'll never understand what
It's like to be trapped under six feet of solid glass,
I can see out, but no one gets in
Screaming at this prison, I've locked myself into,
I'm sorry that I'm still breathing and that I'll
Kill again. But the loneliness is too much for me to handle.
But the taste for fresh blood, pushes me on.
The fear of romance
The pain of living
The joy of sorrow
The strength of forgiving
I told myself the constant pain would ease the tension burning inside
But the nights were cold and the days dragged to weeks,
I will die here alone I will die
God help me, I'm so tired,
but in my dreams the wolves eat out my soul
God help me, I'm so frightened,
but in my dreams wolves tear out my heart
I used to be golden, a saint in a time of sorrow,
but then the turning came and I kissed
The sun goodbye, don't you get it,
it's always darker in my eyes, the screams of my brothers
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If I gave you pretty enough words.
could you paint a picture of us that works.
an emphasis on function rather than design.
aren't you tired cause I will carry you, on a broken back
and blown out knees, I have been where you are for a while..
Aren't you tired of being weak?
Such rage that you could scream. the stars right out of the sky
And destroy the prettiest starry night. every evening that I die.
I am exhumed just a little less human and a lot more bitter and cold. [x3]
I am exhumed.. just a little less human....
so much more bitter and cold....[repeating]
after all these images of pain, have cut right thru you,
I will kiss every scar, and weep you are not alone...
then I'll show you that place in my chest where my heart still tries to beat.
aren't you tired of being weak?
Such rage that you could scream. the stars right out of the sky
and destroy the prettiest starry night. every evening that I die
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