Andrew Bird Album

[No lyrics]

I was getting ready to be a threat
I was getting set for my
Accidental suicide
The kind where no one dies
No one looks too surprised
Then you realize
That you're riding on the para-success
Of a heavy-handed metaphor
And a feeling like you've been here before
'Cause you've been here before
And you've been here before
Then a word washed to shore
A word:

Sovay, Sovay, Sovay
All along the day

I was getting ready to consider my next plan of attack
I think I'm gonna sack
The whole board of trustees
All those Don Quixotes in their B-17s
And I swear this time yeah this time
They'll blow us back to the seventies
And this time they're playin Ride of the Valkyries
With no semblance of grace or ease
And they're acting on vagaries
With their violent proclivities
And they're playing ride
Ride of the Valkyries

Sovay, Sovay, Sovay
All along the day

Over-prescribed, under the mister
We had survived to turn on the History Channel
And ask our esteemed panel, "Why are we alive?"
And here's how they replied
You're what happens when two substances collide
And by all accounts, you really should've died

(whistling)

Stretched out on a Tarmac
6 miles south of North Platte
He can't stand to look back
16 tons of hazmat

It's what goes undelivered
Undelivered oohhoohh
Bom bom bom bom bom

It's a nervous tic motion of the head to the left
It's a nervous tic motion of the head to the left of the what
The head to the left
So exercise yourselves to your bereft
'Cause it's a nervous tic motion of the head to the left of the
Of the, to the...

(Whistling)

Splayed out on the bath-mat
6 miles north of South Platte
He just wants his life back
What's in that paper napsack

It's what goes undelivered
Undelivered oohhoohh
Bom bom bom bom bom

It's a nervous tic motion of the head to the left
A nervous tic motion
Of the head...

(Whistling)

...Head to the left
It's a nervous tic motion of the, of the
to the left
It's a nervous tic motion of the head
to the, of the, of the head,
Of the head to the...

Over-imbibed, under the mister
Barely alive, we cover the blisters in flannel
Though the words we speak are banal
Now one of them's a lie
Now one of them's a lie
You're what happens when two substances collide
And by all accounts, you really should've died

my dewy-eyed disney bride, what has tried
swapping your blood with formaldehyde?
monsters?
whiskey-plied voices cried fratricide!
jesus don't you know that you could've died
(you should've died)
with the monsters that talk, monsters that walk the earth

and she's got red lipstick and a bright pair of shoes
and she's got knee high socks, what to cover a bruise
she's got an old death kit she's been meaning to use
she's got blood in her eyes, in her eyes for you
she's got blood in her eyes for you

certain fads, stripes and plaids, singles ads
they run you hot and cold like a rheostat, i mean a thermostat
so you bite on a towel
hope it won't hurt too bad

my dewy-eyed disney bride, what has tried
swapping your blood with formaldehyde?
what monsters that talk, monsters that walk the earth

and she says i like long walks and sci-fi movies
if you're six foot tall and east coast bred
some lonely night we can get together
and i'm gonna tie your wrists with leather
and drill a tiny hole into your head

get out your measuring cups and we'll play a new game
come to the front of the class and we'll measure your brain
we'll give you a complex and we'll give it a name

get out your measuring sticks and we'll play a new game
can't have the cream when the crop and the cream are the same
liquid or gas no more than the glass will contain

so you talk about a hand of glory
a tale that's rather grim and gory
is it just another children's story
that's been de-clawed?
when the tales of brothers Grimm and Gorey
have been outlawed

I think they're gonna make you start over you don't want to start over
put your backpack on your shoulder be the good little soldier
take your places now
'cause we're all predisposed

measuring cups play a new game
front of the class measure your brain
give you a complex give it a name

put your backpack on your shoulder
be the good little soldier
it's no different when your older
you're predisposed
that's all for questions now
the case is closed!

There's one guy I'd like to thank
He signs the checks and leaves them blank, he's the one
He says you don't have to walk a plank
The game is rigged, go fig your slide show
Tanked and your flagship sank, so

We're taking all our myths to the bank
So just don't, don't forget who to thank
'Cause we're taking our, our myths to the drinking a fifth to the
We're taking all our myths to the bank, oh no

If you could just do him this favor
Although it might involve child labor
Join his entourage, give him a foot massage
From Star Search to the Philharmonic
He'll get you there with Hooked on Phonics
He's the one to know, doesn't matter if you blow, no, no, no, no

In fact it's just the thing, he thinks we're needing
It's a lukewarm liquid diet, they're force feeding
When the words we use have lost their bite
Now they hit you like an imaginary pillow fight
But it's all right, yeah 'cause you're inside and you're in tight

Deals in commodities of the abstract sort
Buys them in bulk but then he sells it short
Talent, genius, love even signs of affection
He floods the market there's no price protection
And when his master plan is unfurled, there stands
A handsome bid on the weather systems of the world

Well you sure didn't look like you were having any fun
With that heavy-metal gaze, they'll have to measure in tons
And when you look up at the sky
All you see are zeros
And all you see are zeros and ones

You took my hand and led me down to watch the Kewpie Doll Parade
We let the kittens lick our hair and drank our chalky lemonade
It's not that I just didn't care I must admit I was afraid
And I'm awfully glad my finger's resting gently on the masterfade
The masterfade

I could a played along the masterfade
I could a played Mah Jongg but it just takes too long
And I just can't remember which way the east wind blows

Does it matter? If we're all matter
What's it matter? Does it matter?
If we're all matter when we're done?
When the sky is full of zeros and ones

I saw you standing all alone in the electrostatic rain
I thought at last, I'd found a situation you can't explain
With GPS, you know it's all just a matter of degrees
Your happiness won't find you underneath that canopy of trees

If the green grass is 6 and the soybeans are 7
The June bugs are 8, the weeds and thistles are 11
The 1's just hold their place, 0's make a smiley face
When they come floating down from the heaven

You took my hand and led me down to watch a Papillon Parade
And we let the kittens lick our hair and drank our chalky lemonade
You squeezed my hand and told me softly that I shouldn't be afraid, no
'Cause all the while your finger's resting gently on the masterfade
Masterfade

I could a played along the masterfade
No no, I could a played Mah Jongg but it just takes too long
Who the hell can remember which way the east wind blows
When you're lying on the ground staring up at that inverted compass
I mean Christ who knows?

I got home this morning with the sun right in my eyes
Therewas no warning as it took me by surprise
Hit me like an act of god causing my alarm
That I'd not become a cephalopod
I still had legs and arms
Still had legs and arms

And today was s'posed to be the day
Molecules decided to change their form
The law of physics lose their sway
Youthful indiscretion is
Suddenly the norm with good kids sprouting horns

And today was s'pose to be
Not just another day
Today was s'pose to be
Opposite day

And those who can't quite function
In societyat large
Are gonnawake up on this morning
And find that they're in charge
While those the worlds set up for
Who are really doing quite well
Gonna wake up institutions
In prison or in hell

And today was s'posed to be
Opposite day

But if you think there's something else
Well your right there is something else
But if you think Im gonna tell you
Think agian why should I think of telling you
What there is
Because silence is knowledge and knowledge is power
I'm under explicit orders to dare not speak its name
No I dare not speak its name
Listen! I just work here
No I dare not speak its name

My skin is white as parchment
Drier than a downtown office building
Where the air is tight
There's time spent, resting on her bones
Waiting for the telephone to ring

Ba-ring, ba-ring, ba-ring
Ba-ring, ba-ring, ba-ring
Ba-ring, ba-ring, ba-ring
Ba-ring, ba-ring, ba-ring

My skin is cold as her toes
On the bathroom floor
Run back to bed and slam the door
Oh, what a lovely sound
Oh, how it shakes the ground
Oh, what a lovely sound
Oh, what a lovely sound
Oh, what a lovely

Skin is my, it's the only thing
That doesn't really fly in my land
And love, oh, love
Is my, love is
It's the only thing that
Butterfly in Thailand

Let it be printed on every T-shirt in this land
On the finest of cottons and the hippest of brands
On bolder letters than the capital I
It's the only thing, it's the only thing
It's the only lonely, whoa

My skin is white as parchment
Drier than a downtown office building
Where the air is tight
There's time spent waiting for that
Macrame bird of prey
To come down and sing

La-ling, la-ling, la-ling
La-ling, la-ling, la-ling
La-ling, la-ling, la-ling
La-ling, la-ling, la-ling

Oh, what a lovely sound
Oh, how it shakes the ground
Oh, what a lovely sound
Oh, how it shakes the ground
Oh, what a lovely sound

Oh, what a lovely sound
Oh, how it shakes the ground
Oh, what a lovely sound
Oh, how it shakes the ground
Oh, what a lovely sound
Oh, oh what a lovely sound

You remind me of you
The way you shot right through and how
You broke my window glass
Fast, it happened so fast

I have to confess that I
That I was impressed that I
That I was impressed that I

Despite all the mess and the broken glass
I was impressed

Here's where I disappeared, where I fell off the pier
And to, and to be rescued I did wait
I watched water bugs skate
As they draw figure eights as they draw

From the bottom of the lake as they draw
I watched water bugs skate as they draw
From the bottom of the lake
I watched the water bugs skate

Memories, like mohair sweaters
Stretched and pilled faux distressed letters
Moose's horns and figure eights
White plastic bags in search of mates

What suffocates the land
In the memory of a garbage can
In memory of a garbage can

But you, you can't be found when the bell rings
You weren't there that day for the naming of things
The naming of things, the naming of things
When your homeroom bell rings
And when your homeroom bell

One, two, three, four
Hey, just look the mess you made today
You really didn't think it would get this bad
Hey, you feel like you're living in a Russian play
Where it seems like you made everybody mad

You remind me of you
When you shot through
And broke my window glass
It happened so fast, I have to confess

I was impressed, and I was impressed
Despite all the mess and the broken glass
I was impressed

But you, you can't be found when the bell rings
You weren't there that day for the naming of things
The naming of things, the naming of things
Where the homeroom bell rings, and when the homeroom bell rings
Is the naming of things, the naming of

Those that will judge
Will say you're aloof
But you know the truth is a seed
You know what you need
Is a conflagration
Cause when I see your blood
And the bits of your broken tooth
It gives me proof that I need
It's the proof that you bleed
And its a revelation
It's a revelation

I thought you were a life-sized paper doll
Propped up in the hardware store
Propped up on the front lawn watching the parade
Of those legionnaires with 2/4s
Marching off to wars

I didnt know what you were made of
Color of blood what you're afraid of
Are you made of calium or are you cardon based
Cause if your made of calium I'll have to take a taste
Calium id deadly, but tender to the tooth
But its one sure-fire way to know if you're mx-missile proof
Or if you're just aloof

And you were in the ground in late November
Though the leaves and earth were damp
Did you think they would remeber
How you almost made state champ
And when you're running for the game against Alfonsus
And you fell upon the ground and chipped your tooth
That might really have surprised us
To learn that maybe you weren't really mx-missiles proof

I thought you were a life-sized paper doll
Propped up in the hardware store
Propped up on the front lawn watching the parade
Of those legionnaires with 2/4s
Marching off to wars
Yeah, their marching off to wars
Their marching

[No lyrics]

If we can call them friends
Then we can call them on their telephones
And they won't pretend that they're too busy
Or they're not alone
And if we can them friends, then we can call
Holler at 'em down these hallowed halls
Just don't let the human factor fail to be a factor
At all

Don't
Don't you worry about the atmosphere
Or any sudden pressure change
'Cause I know that it's starting to get warm in here
And things are starting to get strange

And did you
Did you see how all our friends were there
And they were drinking roses from the can
And how
How I wish I had talked to them
And I wish they fit into the plan

And we were tired of being mild
We were so tired of being mild
And we were tired

I know we're gonna meet some day
In the crumbled financial institutions of this land
There will be tables and chairs
There'll be pony rides and dancing bears
There'll even be a band

'Cause listen, after the fall there'll be no more countries
No currencies at all
We're gonna live on our wits,
We're gonna throw away survival kits
Trade butterfly knives for Adderall

And that's not all
Woah
There will be snacks
There will
There will be snacks
There will be
There will be snacks

And we were tired of being mild
We were so tired of being mild
And we were [so] tired

So don't you
Don't you worry about the atmosphere

When I wake up in the morning
Pour the coffee and I read the paper
An' then I slowly and so softly do the dishes
And feed the fishes

Sing me "Happy Birthday"
Sing it like it's going to be your last day
Like it's Hallelujah
Don't just let it pass on through ya

It's a giant among cliches
And that's why I want you to sing it anyway
Sing me "Happy Birthday"
Only 'cause hell, what's it all about anyway

Sing me "Happy Birthday"
Happy birthday, it's gonna be your last day
Gonna be your last day here on earth

Sing me "Happy Birthday"
Happy birthday, like it's gonna be your
Gonna be your last day