Redman
"Pain In Da Ass Stewardess"

Ladies and Gentleman, we'll be landing in about 20 minutes
Descending into Kennedy Airport
The time is 5:20 am and we're a little bit early this evening
The weather in New York is 55 degrees and there is a light rain falling

Thank you so much for flying with us, I hope you had a pleasant flight
We'll be coming around and collecting your blankets and headphones
So please fasten your seat belt and store your carryon luggage
In the seat beneath your ass

Sir, can you please fasten your seat belts we're preparing for landing
Aight, I'ma do it right now I just gotta get something out of this bag
Sir, can you please put your seat in the upright position
And store your tray table away?

Alright hold on, I told you I'ma do it right in one minute
I just got to get something out of this bag
Sir, can you please turn off that Walkman, I've been telling you
The entire flight, it's against federal regulations to use a walk

Hold on, hold on, hold on, I ain't trying to hear that
Listen I told you I was going to do it in one minute
You're starting to get on my fucking nerves
Get the fuck outta here, aight

Sir, is there a problem?
Yeah, there's a problem
Do I have to alert the captain?
Yeah, alert your captain this

Get the fuck over here
Come here, take me to the fucking captain
Who's in charge here?
I am
I said who's in charge here?
Uh, you are
Alright then, now turn this mutherfucker around

Is this shit on?
Ladies and Gentlemen this is your captain speaking
This is a mutherfucking stickup
We'll be cruising at an altitude of 30,000 feet
I want your wallet, your cash, your jewels
Your rings, baby rings, mutherfucking shoes, sneakers, socks

I want the credit cards, the welfare cards
I even want your fucking freaking flyer mouse
I'm telling you the first mutherfucker to move
Is gonna catch this mutherfucker
Now send the bag around, thank you
Mutherfucker didn't I say don't move