Chris Moyles
"Dogs Don't Kill People"

(Chris)
Step away from the hutch, put the bunny down...before
he put you down,
y'see what I did there...*cough* yeah yeah,

Dogs don't kill people, (all together) rabbits do!!
The truth is out there so we're here to tell you,
Don't be fooled by this cute little bunny, cos when
he's huge you won't think he's funny,
Hopping around in the little cartoon, you'll be nearer
to death than those guys in Cocoon,
You never had a dream as bad as this, like a rabbit in
a mood with a really big gun,
These are not some nuns in habits, these are scary gun
toting rabbits,
Flopsy Mopsy - don't be fooled, cos these are the
animals of the fluffy underworld,
Don't turn out that light at night, cos bunny here's
gonna give you a fright,
So if you find yourself covered in claret, look for
the bunny with the smoky carrot...

(chorus - all together)
Dogs don't kill people, rabbits do,
Summon Elma Fudd, woo woo woo!!
Dogs don't kill people, rabbits do,
Summon Elma Fudd, woo woo woo!!

(Dom)
Dogs don't kill people, (all together) rabbits do!!
I lived in a forest so I know dat it's true,
They'll turn your momma into mincemeat, and then
they'll turn your horse into glue,
So don't go laughing at this silly little rhyme, cos
rabbit's do the killing but they don't do the time,
If I could I'd be top of my class, and I'd take that
rabbit and pop a cap in his ass,
The truth is out, the rabbit is risen,
But these dam rabbits don't ever go to prison,
Bugs Bunny RIP, even Roger Rabbit's in the cemetery...

(chorus - all together)
Dogs don't kill people, rabbits do,
Summon Elma Fudd, woo woo woo!!
Dogs don't kill people, rabbits do,
Summon Elma Fudd, woo woo woo!!

(Dave)
Dogs don't kill people, (all together) rabbits do!!
I look like a rabbit but I wouldn't kill you,
They've got big teeth and they don't do dental, cos
most of these rabbits are absolutely mental,
Here's a story - you better listen,
Cos after you heard it, you won't be dissin',
Had a friend who ended up wacked, got sent up to
heaven and the rabbit even packed,
So if you see a big eared bunny, toting a gun and
thinking he's funny,
Get out of his way or else you just might kick it, on
the way to God with a one way ticket,
Don't need armour, don't need no tanks,
Just a rabbit with a pistol, down his pants,
These rabbits everywhere in the park or the street,
Rabbits everywhere that you hope you don't meet,
Look at the man, they think they're so cool,
Cruising down the road with their ho's and their
honeys,
Don't forget this silly little song,
(him and Chris) Dogs don't kill people, it's just
bunnies!!

(chorus - all together)
Dogs don't kill people, rabbits do,
Summon Elma Fudd, woo woo woo!!
Dogs don't kill people, rabbits do,
Summon Elma Fudd, woo woo woo!!

Dogs!!....Rabbits!!
Dogs!!....Rabbits!!
Dogs!!....Rabbits!!
Dogs!!....Rabbits!!

(fades)